Fear, Parenting, Family
John Beeson
The Trap of Fear-Based Parenting

She was one day old with the brightest, bluest eyes, a bald head, and the cutest little ears that stuck nearly perpendicular out of her head.

We checked out at the hospital's front desk and walked to our car with our baby girl in the car seat. As the safety officer checked out the security of our car seat base, a wave of fear came over me. Why would they let us take this beautiful baby home?

To be a parent is to experience fear. Will they be safe? Will they be bullied? Will they make friends? Will they like me? Will they survive a sexually confused world?

The Trap of Fear-Based Parenting
Recommendations, Christian Living, Church, Religion
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. When bitterness becomes your religion, healing becomes heresy: Christopher Cook says, “But here’s the fruit of that belief system: the most anxious, entitled, bitter, and emotionally fragile generation in history. The world is not freer. It is more fractured. The culture of curated authenticity has not led us to peace, but to exhaustion.”

  2. Mortifying our desire: Keith Evans begins, “A young man once told me, “I never chose to feel this way. These attractions seem to have always been part of my life.” His honesty captures what so many experience—same-sex attraction often feels unchosen, even natural. But when we look to Scripture, we discover even that which may feel natural is not always good.”

This Week's Recommendations
Biblical Studies, Family, Suffering
John Beeson
Yesterday's Promise Might Be Today's Curse

Where would the bread come from?

Jacob heard his grandchildren’s whimpers as they rustled in the neighboring tents. He knew tears were running down their faces as their tiny empty bellies cried out.

Where would the next meal come from? The drought had devastated the crop.
Travelers from the North had spent the night. They carried bags of grain and shared news that the Pharaoh had storehouses of grain. They had met with his right-hand man, Zaphenath-paneah.

Seven years earlier, the Pharaoh was troubled. He couldn’t shake the nightmares. Skinny cows devouring fat cows, thin stalks of grain consuming fat stalks.

Yesterday's Promise Might Be Today's Curse
Christian Living, Gratitude, Relationships, Wisdom
John Beeson
Wanderlust and the Christian Life

“Oh the places you’ll go!” Dr. Seuss believed that the true achiever is an adventurer: “You’ll head straight out of town. It’s opener there in the wide open air. Out there things can happen and frequently do to people as brainy and footsy as you.”

“We’re taking a vision trip to Florida,” our friends shared. Tired of the heat of the Sonoran Desert, they set out to find the perfect place for their family to settle. I’ve been part of several similar conversations. It’s healthy for couples to dream together. I’ve seen God weave those dreams into something that honors him and blesses others.

Wanderlust and the Christian Life
Recommendations, Family, Identity, Parenting, Relationships
John Beeson
This Week's Recommendations

  1. I’ve studied over 200 kids—here are six magic phrases that make kids listen to their parents: Good things to tell people, not just your kids. Reem Raouda says, “Parents are constantly searching for ways to get their kids to listen. But a lot of us focus too much on trying to get them to obey in the moment, rather than building genuine long-term cooperation.”

  2. Seven lies about our love lives: Eric Geiger shares, “’It’s just between us’: The world, especially in the West, paints relationships as just between the two people.

This Week's Recommendations

relationships

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Wanderlust and the Christian Life

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Wanderlust and the Christian Life

“Oh the places you’ll go!” Dr. Seuss believed that the true achiever is an adventurer: “You’ll head straight out of town. It’s opener there in the wide open air. Out there things can happen and frequently do to people as brainy and footsy as you.”

“We’re taking a vision trip to Florida,” our friends shared. Tired of the heat of the Sonoran Desert, they set out to find the perfect place for their family to settle. I’ve been part of several similar conversations. It’s healthy for couples to dream together. I’ve seen God weave those dreams into something that honors him and blesses others.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

  1. I’ve studied over 200 kids—here are six magic phrases that make kids listen to their parents: Good things to tell people, not just your kids. Reem Raouda says, “Parents are constantly searching for ways to get their kids to listen. But a lot of us focus too much on trying to get them to obey in the moment, rather than building genuine long-term cooperation.”

  2. Seven lies about our love lives: Eric Geiger shares, “’It’s just between us’: The world, especially in the West, paints relationships as just between the two people.

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Why Would I Go to Counseling?

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Why Would I Go to Counseling?

I’m more faithful with oil changes than I am with annual visits. I’ve missed more annual well-checks to the doctor than I’ve made. It seems like a waste of time to tell the doctor that I’m not experiencing any physical difficulties, have him check my blood pressure only to confirm it is within the healthy range, and then pay on my way out the door for what I already knew.

Many of us feel the same way about counseling. Why would I go to a counselor unless things are falling apart?

There is a grain of truth in this impulse.

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My Dogs Foolishness, My Foolishness

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My Dogs Foolishness, My Foolishness

I’m working from home today. It’s a great working environment: calm and focused. Our dog lies peacefully at my feet. Until a vehicle dares to enter our cul-de-sac, that is. Then our 25-pound Australian Labradoodle leaps to the window, both paws on the window sill, and turns into a ferocious beast.

The Amazon delivery guy pulls up to the curb, jumps out with a package in tow, and places it at the front door. Our dog howls as though a cadre of gunmen have encircled our property. This is no sociable bark to his neighborhood doggie friends: this is a protect-the-house-at-all-costs-bay. The deliveryman hustles back to his van and pulls out of the cul-de-sac.

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Let Marriage Sustain Your Love

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Let Marriage Sustain Your Love

Yesterday we celebrated my parents’ 50th anniversary and offered words of thanks to them. Next Saturday I have the blessing of officiating a memorial service and a wedding. Preparing for these three events has had me reflecting on the weight of our choices and the gift of God’s design for marriage. In a world where marriages are often built on shifting sands—self-interest, emotional highs, or cultural expectations—Bonhoeffer’s sermon reminds us that marriage is not sustained by love alone but by God’s design and God’s love. What lessons can we draw from this sermon for today?

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Does Forgiveness Excuse Evil

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Does Forgiveness Excuse Evil

There is a BIG difference between forgiveness and reconciliation. The Bible has a lot to say about the importance of forgiving others, but how do we do that when someone keeps hurting us? What does the Bible say about justice, sin, evil and how we respond when someone wrongs us? Join host Andrew Marcus as he spends time with pastor and ministry friend John Beeson as he dissects what restoration ought to look like in our relationships, and how to trust God and others in the process.

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Deep Calls to Deep

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Deep Calls to Deep

We’ve all heard how poor the state of mental health in America. But the numbers are truly staggering. “Rates of depression and anxiety in the United States—fairly stable in the 2000s—rose by more than 50 percent in many studies from 2010 to 2019. The suicide rate rose 48 percent for adolescents ages 10 to 19. For girls ages 10 to 14, it rose 131 percent.” We have a serious problem.

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How to Raise Kids Who Are Best Friends

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How to Raise Kids Who Are Best Friends

Did you like your siblings when you were growing up? Do your kids like each other?

 

Every parent wants their children to be friends. One of the best gifts of my childhood was my friendship with my sister. The gift of a playmate and a confidant, of someone to walk through life’s ups and downs with you, is incalculable. 

Over time I’ve realized that the gift of my friendship with my sister, Sarah, has paid enormous dividends in my life. It was that friendship that taught me how to navigate conflict, how to apologize and reconcile, how to comfort, and how to navigate long-distance friendship. My relationship with Sarah has always been a touchstone of learning and growth. Looking back on my friendship with Sarah, I realize that is where I learned to be a husband as well.

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How Can We Help the Hurting?

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How Can We Help the Hurting?

Hard news surrounds us. Health issues. Wars. Famine. Persecution. How can we help? The needs can feel overwhelming.

 

When Helping Hurts by Brian Fikkert and Steve Corbett, one of the most impactful books written about poverty alleviation from a Christian perspective in the past two decades. The book is written from the perspective of economists with significant experience in ministries seeking to make a difference in the lives of those born into poverty. As the title suggests, Fikkert and Corbett make a persuasive argument that most of the well-intentioned aid efforts of the West actually hurt those they are seeking to help.

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How Do You Forgive Someone Who Is Gone?

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How Do You Forgive Someone Who Is Gone?

“I want to forgive him, but how do I forgive someone who died years ago?”

“I want to forgive her, but I don’t have any way to contact her.”

 Do you have someone in your life that you want to forgive, but you don’t know how to because they are no longer in your life or perhaps they have passed away? This topic has come up a number of times in counseling others. May I offer some advice?

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