One of the many disappointing realities about the American political landscape is the lack of ownership. It’s not just politicians who shirk ownership – we all do. When my microphone sounds wonky, my mind immediately goes to the sound tech wondering if he will remedy his mistake, not to the more likely responsible party: myself. I probably moved the microphone or pulled the cord.
Of course we know that avoiding ownership usually backfires. Our esteem falls for those who dodge responsibility. But even still, the temptation to blame shift is strong in all of us.
“I am what I feel” sums up expressive individualism. Our culture frames identity around discovering what our deepest desires and longings are. To know our longings is to know ourselves.
In Billie Eilish’s 2023 song “What was I made for?” written for “Barbie,” Eilish reflects on the confusing journey to understand her feelings. It’s this journey, she assures herself that will lead to her happiness.
“The end is near!” “Repent!”
Have you ever seen a statement of prophetic warning spray-painted on a wall or in a subway station? got to be honest, I don’t take much notice to such warnings. But what if those warnings were for me and for you?
We are feeling all the feels. Our youngest, Soren, is about to graduate from high school. This has been a season of reflection for Angel and me and a season of preparation. In our children’s ministry hallways at New Life next to each age level we have containers that represent how many days of influence remain for you as a parent before your child launches. I recognize, of course, that there is no finish line for parenting, but one’s influence and role changes significantly in each season.
As we look back on our parenting, the most important things we taught our children were who God is and who they were.
Intrusive thoughts are unwelcome and hard to control. I can remember having intrusive thoughts from the time I was a child. When we drove, I often felt the compulsion to press one foot down on the floor between the telephone poles (and yes, I also hopped over the cracks in the sidewalk). At other times, when walking alone, I remember the persistent thought, “He’s watching you.” I would search the bushes and trees for the one my mind told me was watching me.
How I Would Explain a Christian View of Trans-Genderism to a Non-Christian: Samuel James takes on this loaded topic. He says, “Our broken, sinful world facilitates the deepest kind of frustration and shame toward our own bodies.”
An Open Letter to a Young Woman Contemplating an Abortion: Leah Savas’s article is a must-read. She says, “You’re not an accident, and neither is that baby inside of you. A Creator formed you and formed your baby with the same intentionality that your grandma has when she knits a pair of mittens.”
Four Guidelines for Dating Without Regrets: Simple wisdom from Tim Challies. “Stop acting like you’re married when you’re not. We tend to see exclusive dating relationships as quasi-marriages in which couples quickly become strongly entangled emotionally, romantically, and even physically.”
What Does “Heap Burning Coals On His Head” Mean? Interesting stuff from Steve Cornell. He considers five possible interpretations of this verse.
Before You Pack Up and Leave: Tim Challies offers counsel to someone considering leaving a church. He asks, “[W]hat should you do when you begin feeling discontent at your church? What should you do when you feel that yearning to pick up and move on? What should you do when you find yourself eager to slip out of one church and into another? I’d like to offer just a few suggestions that I hope you’ll consider and put into practice.”
Perhaps the most uncomfortable thing about Christianity is not that God exists, and not that God sent his Son to the earth. It’s not the miracles: did God really make the universe out of nothing? Did Jesus really rise from the dead? It’s not even that its ethical stance on sexuality feels behind the times.
The most uncomfortable thing about Christianity is unequivocally our call to not just believe in, but to grant God authority in our lives and live faithfully and righteously.
In 2 Peter 2, Peter admonishes the church to beware of those who are false teachers and prophets. He says, “And many will follow their sensuality, and because of them the way of truth will be blasphemed.” It’s interesting that he uses the word sensuality here. He doesn’t say, “And many will follow their false beliefs,” he says, “And many will follow their sensuality.”[i]
The result, not the cause, of our sensual desires is believing in false teaching.
The hook of false beliefs is rarely the beliefs themselves. Atheism, frankly, isn’t a very attractive belief system on its own merits. By its very definition, life contains no meaning: the brutal and blind hand of the natural world is all that is. It raises more questions than it solve: from the question of creation to the problem of evil to ethics. The hook of atheism is sensuality. If there is no God, there is no one you have to cede authority of your life to.
It’s why agnosticism is much more popular than atheism[ii] You get the same freedom and don’t have to swallow nearly as bitter a pill.
As LGBTQ Identification Rise, Conversations More Important: Aaron Earls reports, “Today, 10.5% of millennial adults identify as LGBTQ, whereas 5.8% did so 2017.”
Young Adults Have Complicated Relationship with Money: Marissa Postell reports that, “The typical Christian young adult donates more than three times as much as non-Christians over the course of a year ($1,820 v. $556).”
How to Work With a Domineering Boss: Joseph Grenny at Crucial Conversations responds to this question in a surprising way, “I have a domineering boss who micromanages everything I do. He has no filter when speaking to me and often is just outright rude. Whenever I send out a piece of work, he finds fault with it and tries to undermine my confidence. Having read online about his characteristics, I truly believe he suffers from narcissism. The sad fact is that he gets results and senior management love him, so he is untouchable. How can I deal with this aside from leaving the company?”
No, Christianity is Not as Bad as You Think: Josh Howerton responds to five cultural narratives. He begins with this one, “Cultural narrative #1: Christians aren’t really pro-life; they’re just pro-birth. Christians are sometimes accused of being pro-birth more than pro-life. They pretend to be passionate about the lives of the unborn as a political weapon, the argument goes, but they don’t really care about children once they’re born. But the data tells a different story.
The Liturgy of Powers: Carl Trueman begins, “The trans revolution reached new heights of absurdity last week when the BBC asked Anneliese Dodds, the Labour party’s shadow secretary for women and equalities, to define “woman.” Dodds proved singularly incapable of doing so; after saying that “it does depend what the context is,” she equivocated for several minutes and refused to give a direct answer
A week and a half ago, my wife Angel and I had the opportunity to share with our Student Ministries about sex and sexuality.
Here is the outline of our talk:
Why is sex complicated?
What our sexuality has to do with trusting God.
What do we say to “Love is love”?
Why our identity is found in our sainthood, not our sexuality.
How our sexuality is for our joy and our discipleship.
Q&A
Why Religion is Good for Us: Mark Clark gives a great recap of some interesting data on why religion is a force for good in the world. For example, “In 247 studies done between 1944 and 2010: religion has a positive effect on society in regard to crime, deviance, and delinquency.”
Long as the Curse is Found: An evocative piece from my friend Benjamin Vrbicek. He reflects on the new year and God’s grace, “A rain barrel, as it were, positioned by God’s grace, sits under my hands and captures more sacred moments than I realize. As a new year will be here in just a week, maybe I should be more excited about the prospect of catching new moments, a huge cupful of them. After all, a new year with new mercies awaits. How can that not be exciting?”
Wisdom for Those Dating or Engaged to Someone Who Views Pornography: Jenny Solomon has a number of helpful things to say here. It starts here: “[Y]ou aren’t the solution to another person’s porn problem. He doesn’t look at porn because he wants/needs to have sex with you but can’t yet. He looks at porn because he lacks self-control. Your honeymoon won’t be a wand that waves over her porn issues and turns them magically into contented married sex.”
4 Predictions: Samuel James offers four predictions about Christians both conservative and liberal. He concludes, “The group that will be left in most local churches will be an ethnically mixed group.”
Building Trust Through Forgiveness: Angel and I were grateful to be able to share some of our story with our friends at Romans 12 Ministries. I hope it encourages you.
A Pillar of Salt: TM Suffield warns us of nostalgia during Christmas season, “Advent tells me that my idea of Christmas is manufactured nostalgia, a good portion of which is created by people who want to sell me things. They don’t want me to be satisfied, or to learn to wait, or to wrestle the darkness—they want me just the right sort of sad to buy more things.”
The Middle Years: Melissa Edgington begins her reflection on mid-life, “These days I feel a little as if I’m grieving for a younger me. I look in the mirror, and I contend with the greying hair and the imperfections that come with age, always shocked to remember that my neckline sags in the way of grandmothers and old great aunts. I have come to middle age, and I must say that it’s a difficult stop on this journey of being a woman.”
7 in 10 Women Who Have Had an Abortion Identify as Christian: This is an eye-opening report that ought to remind us that we need to care not just for the unborn, but for those who have to navigate the tragic decision of abortion. We need to be vulnerable places of care and support. The findings state, “For half of those regular churchgoers (52%), they still haven’t told anyone at their church about their abortion. Less than 2 in 5 (38%) say someone at their church knows they had an abortion. Women likely haven’t told people at their church because most don’t see the church or the people there as safe and feel they will be judged, not loved.”
Our Dog’s Annual Performance Review: Caroline O’Donoghue’s article had me cracking up. “You are a terrible employee. But you’re a very, very good girl.”
Sexual Abuse, Sexual Brokenness, and the Gospel: Preston Sprinkle interviews Jay Stringer on his podcast “Theology in the Raw.” Stringer shares his findings in his book Unwanted: How Sexual Brokenness Reveals Our Way to Healing. The book shares significant research that reveals the key drivers of unwanted sexual behavior: from pornography to infidelity.
Science Can’t Answer Transgenderism’s Deepest Questions: Shane Morris says, “The transgender movement has taken the primary question of this cultural debate completely out of the realm of science. By every identifiable physical trait, a person may be a member of one sex. But if, despite all of this, he identifies as the opposite sex, that is what he really is, according to the transgender movement.”
Where Doctrine Meets the Desolate: Lara d’Entremont begins her powerful post, “I cried in my home office with only the moon providing streaks of light for me. My sobs distorted my words so much I’m sure only God could understand my prayers—pleas for relief, a sign, a moment of comfort, or his fatherly touch—anything to carry me just one more step forward.”
Should We Pursue Self-Love? Randy Alcorn might overstate his case a bit here, but the core argument is solid. He begins, “I’ve often heard it said in evangelical messages, books, and articles that God’s Word teaches three kinds of love—love for God, love for others, and love for self.”
Know Yourself and Speak: Pierce Hibbs begins with these sobering statistics, “According to a recent study, one in ten men struggles with anxiety or depression, but less than half of these seek help. Men die 3.5 times more often than women from suicide. They’re also twice as likely to binge drink. Perhaps most disturbing, another study found that 45% of men believe their mental health problems will resolve themselves, and so they admit to never talking to anyone else about their issues. In light of those truths.”
Abortion Battled at the Supreme Court: Last week one of the most significant cases in our lifetime was argued before the Supreme Court. It’s worth listening to the entirety of the arguments that were made.
1. Dune is a Majestic Defense of Going to the Movies: Samuel James shares not only what makes Dune a great movie (I can attest it’s certainly that), but one that makes an argument for why the big screen can be better than the small screen. He says, “You only get films like Dune—ambitious, ponderous, beautiful films—when you have filmmakers who believe their audience can experience such a vision. And there is no such vision possible on a smartphone or laptop screen. Dune is an argument that cinemas are worth saving.”
2. Porn is Bad for You: Katherine Dee explains, “It’ll impact your taste; your openness to certain behaviors; the language you use to talk about sex; the lens you use to think about it. And for some people, like the kid who eats chocolate cake every day or the person who attends too many lavish parties, it might just start to bore you. You might desensitize yourself to sex all together.”
3. When the Beauty Never Leaves: A gorgeous piece of writing by AW Workman. It concludes by pointing us to God’s glory, “Steady on, my soul. One day the beauty will come – and it will never leave.”
4. How to Unite a Divided People: Carey Niewhof says, “The future doesn’t show any signs of uniting people automatically. In fact, left unattended, the divisions will likely only grow deeper and wider. One of the key tasks of leadership is to unite people around a common cause. That’s what leaders do.”
5. Best of the Beatles Cover in 6 Minutes: Another fun one from Walk off the Earth.
Husbands, Be Like Adam: Usually we consider the ways Adam failed as a husband. But he did succeed in at least one way. Aaron Sironi explains that, “When we experience a dire situation, we are tempted to wallow in shame and to despair and turn against others. We must remember and believe God’s promises and his Good News, but not just for ourselves. We must turn in faith and love and speak with hopeful confidence to those around us.”
I’m Not All That Awesome: Adam Ramsey explains, “The gospel means that I’m not all that awesome. But I am loved. And that’s awesome. The gospel frees me to be honest about the ways I fall short instead of being crushed by them, because it reminds me that Jesus was crushed for me.”
I Do Ordinary Work: Dan Doriani explains that ordinary work is beautiful work. He concludes, “So let us lay down the deflating rhetoric of “I just” and affirm the value of ordinary work. Let us also look to change our corner of the world, even if our corner is modest and only a few notice what we do. If our Lord sees it, that should be enough.”
Fear No Evil: My friend Anne Imboden reflects on fear that grabs our heart and how to navigate it. She says, “Fear comes in two forms: rational and irrational. When we’re young, irrational fears are common. Monsters under our bed, for example. I myself had a ridiculously irrational fear of swallowing pills. I was sure the pill, however small it was, would lodge itself in my throat and I would suffocate. I insisted on taking all medicines in liquid form until I was in high school.”
How Do We Overcome Sexual Sin? Bob Kelleman points us to analyze our longings. He says, “Jesus knows all about all of us. As our Creator, He knows that our core issue is a worship issue. That’s why, with the Samaritan woman, He doesn’t focus on her “co-dependency” or even her “sexual addiction” per se. Jesus focuses on her core spiritual thirst.”
Sign up to get The Bee Hive delivered to your inbox and receive a free 50 Books That Changed My Life (and Might Change Yours, Too) download!
