Spiritual Growth, Christian Living, Wisdom, Identity
John Beeson
The Power of Ownership

One of the many disappointing realities about the American political landscape is the lack of ownership. It’s not just politicians who shirk ownership – we all do. When my microphone sounds wonky, my mind immediately goes to the sound tech wondering if he will remedy his mistake, not to the more likely responsible party: myself. I probably moved the microphone or pulled the cord.

Of course we know that avoiding ownership usually backfires. Our esteem falls for those who dodge responsibility. But even still, the temptation to blame shift is strong in all of us.

The Power of Ownership
Identity, Biblical Studies, Christian Living, Death, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
Our Desires Lead to Death

“I am what I feel” sums up expressive individualism.  Our culture frames identity around discovering what our deepest desires and longings are. To know our longings is to know ourselves.

 

In Billie Eilish’s 2023 song “What was I made for?” written for “Barbie,” Eilish reflects on the confusing journey to understand her feelings. It’s this journey, she assures herself that will lead to her happiness.

Our Desires Lead to Death
Spiritual Growth, Christian Living, Forgiveness, Wisdom
John Beeson
A Dire Warning for Me? Where?

“The end is near!” “Repent!”

Have you ever seen a statement of prophetic warning spray-painted on a wall or in a subway station? got to be honest, I don’t take much notice to such warnings. But what if those warnings were for me and for you?

A Dire Warning for Me? Where?
Identity, Parenting
John Beeson
Do You Have a Graduate in Your Life?

We are feeling all the feels. Our youngest, Soren, is about to graduate from high school. This has been a season of reflection for Angel and me and a season of preparation. In our children’s ministry hallways at New Life next to each age level we have containers that represent how many days of influence remain for you as a parent before your child launches. I recognize, of course, that there is no finish line for parenting, but one’s influence and role changes significantly in each season.

 As we look back on our parenting, the most important things we taught our children were who God is and who they were.

Do You Have a Graduate in Your Life?
Fear, Identity, Prayer, Spiritual Growth
John Beeson
Exchanging Intrusive Thoughts for God-talk

Intrusive thoughts are unwelcome and hard to control. I can remember having intrusive thoughts from the time I was a child. When we drove, I often felt the compulsion to press one foot down on the floor between the telephone poles (and yes, I also hopped over the cracks in the sidewalk). At other times, when walking alone, I remember the persistent thought, “He’s watching you.” I would search the bushes and trees for the one my mind told me was watching me.

Exchanging Intrusive Thoughts for God-talk

men

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She Wanted Out: Navigating an Unwanted Divorce

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She Wanted Out: Navigating an Unwanted Divorce

I’m so glad to be able to bring you a guest post from my friend Wes Jackson today. Wes has been a friend of mine since Middle School and brings transparency and wisdom to this sensitive topic. I’m sure you will benefit from navigating his experience of divorce and I encourage you to share it with friends who would profit from his insight as well.

Grace and peace,

John

When Divorce Happens: Through a Husband’s Eyes

It was Halloween Day, 2017, when my ex-wife told me she wanted a divorce. This announcement didn’t come completely out of the blue. We were ten days out from our last big fight, and it was only eight days since she sat me down to let me know that she wanted to stay together through the holidays for our kids’ sake and then separate in the new year.

We had been married for about eight and a half years and they were very difficult years together. We had tried Christian counseling. We’d met and prayed with our pastor. I thought we’d tried about everything possible and maybe separation wouldn’t be such a bad idea. We could give each other some space so things could cool down while we continued to meet with our Christian counselor with the hope of reconciling the marriage.

When her desire for a separation changed to a desire for a divorce, everything became much more difficult.

What followed was six to eight months with attorneys and paperwork and appearances in the Arizona Family Court system. During this time, I made three separate overtures to try and reconcile the marriage, but all of them were refused. My wife made it very clear that she was done with the marriage and had moved on.

While I can honestly say that I didn’t want to divorce my wife, I can’t say that I should have been surprised that she wanted to divorce me.

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Leadership in the Home and Beyond

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Leadership in the Home and Beyond

Who are the most influential leaders in your life? What made them such great leaders?

I fear that our cultural understanding of leadership is going further and further astray from what true leadership is. We Americans seem to have a bizarre attraction to two types of leaders: celebrities and powerful communicators with bold, brash opinions. We judge leaders by the size of their platform.

I was recently asked to speak to the Mom’s Matter group in our church about what healthy leadership in the home and beyond looks like. One of the comments by the leadership team that was made to me was that many moms believe they “don’t need to be or can’t be a leader because they are just moms.”

I believe that’s an issue with men and women alike. The task of leadership feels daunting and we feel like we are unequal to the task, and so we shrink back from it.

If leadership is influence, then every one of us is called to leadership. God has gifted you with influence. God has called and equipped you to influence your family. God has called and equipped you to influence your friends. God has called and equipped you to influence your church.

You are called to lead.

But the order of how we develop as leaders is important. We are called to lead our home first and that leadership is intended to cascade outward.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.      Poll Finds "Dramatic and Sudden Shift" Toward a Pro-Life Position: Aaron Earls reports, " The latest Marist poll finds 47 percent of Americans identify as pro-life and 47 percent identify as pro-choice. Just one month ago, however, Americans were more likely to identify as pro-choice than pro-life by 17 percentage points—55 to 38 percent."

2.      How the Pro-Life Movement was Had: Andree Seu Peterson's pointed article begins, "They said who knows when life begins. So we said, OK, let’s talk about when life begins. “Before I formed you in the womb I knew you, and before you were born I consecrated you,” we quoted from Jeremiah 1, verse 5. We’re not into religion, they replied. So we said fair enough, forget the Bible, let’s talk science, you like science, right? And if the science proves when life begins, then you’ll stop killing babies in the womb, agreed?"

3.      Seven Church Member Attitudes That Lead to the Death of Churches: We all want thriving churches. Thom Rainer has helpful thoughts in this podcast on ways that we as church members can help combat churches declining and dying.

4.      The Church Growth Gap: Aaron Earls reports, "Three in five (61%) pastors say their churches faced a decline in worship attendance or growth of 5 percent or less in the last three years. Almost half (46%) say their giving decreased or stayed the same from 2017 to 2018."

5.      How Men and Women Spend Their Days: Cool dynamic infograph from Flowing Data.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       There Goes that Pesky Biological Reality Again: Matthew Hosier on when the trend toward progressive views on gender backfire, " It turns out that when it comes to health men and women are not the same. Contrary to popular opinion, men have a higher pain threshold than women (though older men feel pain more than younger men as their levels of testosterone decrease); women are more prone to knee injuries than men, because of the size of their pelvis; the male brain has more connections within each hemisphere while the female brain has more connections between the two hemispheres..."

2.       4 Reminders for the Weary Mom on Mother’s Day: You are loved, moms! These are healthy reminders. I love this one: “You are exactly the mom they need… Long before you actually had children, even before you rocked a baby doll and pretended to be a mommy, God knew the children He would place in your life. He could see what kind of mom you would be. Our God is not a random god. His works have purpose and meaning, and even before He made you a mother, He shaped you for motherhood. This motherhood.”

3.       How an Ancient Pagan Roman Saved an Atheist: John Woodbridge shares his story of deconversion, and then God's rescuing hand in his life. He shares the pivotal moment of his life, "Like a thunderbolt, the idea struck me that Jesus might very well have existed and walked this earth. After all, I reasoned, Tacitus was no Christian propagandist and had nothing to gain in reporting a myth... As I read the statement by Tacitus, it dawned on me that if Jesus had existed, it had potentially huge implications... Could it be that Jesus not only existed but that his message was true after all?"

4.       Godly People are Happy People: My friend John Starke reflects on this truth, " The longer I live as a Christian the more it becomes apparent that the holy life — a life lived with a conscience before God — is a happy life. Sadly, it takes some misery to see it. Sin not only offends God, it disrupts the Christian’s communion with God and forces him to sense his Maker’s displeasure."

5.       Why Raising Your Children to be Independent is a Bad Idea: Bob Kauflin reflects on why raising your children to be independent is a fool's errand, "...I began to consider the adults I respected. They didn’t do things on their own... Then it hit me. The most mature people in my life were not those who belittled the input and counsel of those around them, but those who welcomed and even pursued it. Their awareness of their weaknesses caused them to seek out other eyes and perspectives. That realization shed new light on our parenting goals."

6.       Billions of Birds Migrate. Where Do They Go? This graphic-rich National Geographic article is a must read even for those, like myself, who don't have a particular interest in birds.

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This Week's Recommendations

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This Week's Recommendations

1.       The Stanford Medicine Report on How Men and Women's Brains Are Actually Different: After nearly 20 years of data, it is clear that there are biological differences between men and women,  "The two hemispheres of a woman’s brain talk to each other more than a man’s do. In a 2014 study, University of Pennsylvania researchers...found that the females’ brains consistently showed more strongly coordinated activity between hemispheres, while the males’ brain activity was more tightly coordinated within local brain regions."

2.       6 Character Traits to Look for in a Potential Spouse:  Really good lists here. Thoughtful inclusions that ring true to unseen obstacles many couples face. I particularly appreciate the inclusion of "controls his passions" and "is in the process of becoming a leader" for a potential husband and "Knows how to admit she's wrong, ask for forgiveness, grant forgiveness, and give grace when you fail her" for a potential wife.

3.       Just-Around-the-Corner-Spirituality: Mike Emlet reflects on the promises we tell ourselves about the next season of spiritual growth that will be just around the corner: "The blessed and contented life is not somewhere around the corner where we can imagine living in the perfect spiritual greenhouse to nurture growth. It’s right here, right now, as we learn to experience the sufficiency of Christ’s strength for us in the midst of the good, the bad, and the ugly."

4.       Your Sanctification is a Gift: I love this perspective that Tim Challies offers -- something I've never quite thought of this way before. "Your continual growth in holiness is not something you emphasize merely for your own benefit or your own assurance, but something you pursue for the benefit of others. This message cuts hard against the individualism of western society, so is one we need to hear again and again. A wife’s sanctification is a gift she gives her husband. A pastor’s sanctification is a gift he gives his congregation. A parent’s sanctification is a gift he gives his children." 

5.       Just How Big is the Universe? I love feeling my mind dwarfed by presentations like this.  

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