Last week I shared the first half of our story that was posted over at Reclaimed Story. Here is the second half.

In the weeks following Angel’s confession of adultery I was in a state of shock. I was asked to take a leave of absence from the church, which was difficult for me to accept. From the time I was ten, my understanding of my identity was inextricable from my calling as a pastor. I was about to no longer be a pastor.

The next six months would be the most difficult time of my life. Angel’s confession of her affair would be peeled back. Her confession of one affair became confessions of a series of affairs and I would have to come face-to-face with the ugliness of my own heart.

Counseling was really rocky as well. I thought we would be working to repair the damage and rebuild our relationship, but what our counselors quickly became aware of was that Angel had compartmentalized a significant amount of the previous two-and-a-half years. Every session peeled back more hurtful layers.

ANGEL:

I had not intentionally held back from John the layers of my infidelity.

But, in my self-hatred I had compartmentalized swaths of sin that I wouldn’t be able to face without months of counseling.

Beyond my ongoing affair with a man in our church, I had also been involved in a series of other sexual encounters, most of which were one-night stands.

JOHN:

But, I kept asking Angel questions and she kept answering them, as painful as it was. With every revelation, there was the simultaneous reality of trust being built and the wound being reopened.

I wept constantly. I wept tears of grief, tears of anger, tears of sadness, tears of despair, tears of hurt. Sometimes Angel’s revelations would overwhelm me, other times they would crush me.

You can read the rest of the story here or listen to the podcast here.

Read last week’s post here.

Read the Original posts from The Bee Hive here: 1.Our Story: The Start; 2. Our Story: Foxes Loosed; 3. Our Story: Confession; 4. Our Story: Restoration