Creating a Family of Belovedness

We stepped into the candy shop and could feel it immediately. We were welcome here. And no, it wasn’t just the aroma of chocolate wafting through the air (although that helped!). It was in the kind eyes of the shop owner, in the smile of her employee as she swept the floor. The sign outside said the shop closed five minutes earlier. “Are you sure it’s okay we come in?” I cautiously asked. “Of course!” she said. And I could feel that she meant it.

 

The atmosphere in her candy shop stood in stark contrast with the cold and unwelcome atmospheres of several other shops we had visited in this tired New Mexican town. Near the end of our summer vacation, we all felt the unmistakable depression that lingered in this small town.

 

“You’re playing Christian music,” my wife commented to the happy owner. “Are you a believer?” “Oh yes!” she replied, as she scooped out ice cream for us. In the sermon on the Mount, Jesus encourages his followers, “Let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven” (Matt. 5:16). Jesus isn’t just talking about good works grudgingly done, he’s talking about good works done from the right heart. And we can sense that in others, can’t we? Good works that come out of a sense of freedom and joy feel very different from those that arise out of obligation or self-righteousness. There is a beautiful aroma that wafts from good works done as if no one were looking, good works not done for the purpose of self-glorification, but done as unto the Lord.

 

How would you describe the atmosphere in your home? Relaxed? Anxious? Tender? Conflicted? Busy? Joyful? Legalistic?

 

How about the atmosphere in your church? What does it feel like to step into your church’s foyer on a Sunday morning?

 

How do we change the atmospheres in our homes and churches? Change begins with experiencing the love of God.

 

Consider the baptism of Jesus. The Father has placed on Jesus’ shoulders the most significant mission ever: he will declare the coming Kingdom of God, heal the sick, resurrect the dead, feed the hungry, convict the sinner, defend the marginalized, then die at the hands of those he came to save for their salvation. But he hadn’t yet accomplished any of it. As Jesus rises out of the Jordan river, the Father speaks his delight over his son, “This is my son in whom I am well pleased” (Matt. 3:17). He doesn’t say, “Get ready, it’s game time.” The Father speaks his blessing over his Son, who has yet to fulfill anything he was put on earth to accomplish.

 

So it is with us. Paul reminds us, “God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us” (Roms 5:8). The love of the Father precedes our good works for when Paul says “while we were still sinners” he means from the perspective of eternity past before even Creation when God would foresee our past, present, and future sins, and choose us anyway! In that moment when “Christ died for us” on the cross he had your name written on his heart as he absorbed all your sins.

 

Anyone traveling to another country knows that customs officers don’t mess around. They might grill you about what you are bringing into the country, who you are visiting, where you are going, and what your intentions are in the country. I’ve been asked all of those questions. I’ve never felt warmly welcomed by a customs officer.

 

Right now, our daughter Camille is studying abroad in England. We can’t wait for her to come home. When she arrives home, will we grill her? “What are the purposes of your stay at our home?” “Who do you plan to visit?” “What are you bringing into our home?” Certainly not! We will throw the door open, wrap her in our arms, and welcome her in. She is family!

 

In Ephesians 2, Paul tells us, “So then you are no longer strangers and aliens, but you are fellow citizens with the saints and members of the household of God” (Eph 2:19).

 

Do some of our churches welcome one another more like customs officers than family members? How do we treat addicts who walk through our doors? Those who are divorced? Those who struggle with mental health? Those who are disabled? Those who are financially insecure? Someone wearing a MAGA hat? Someone wearing a rainbow pride t-shirt? Do we greet them as beloved sisters and brothers?   

 

God longs for us to know his love and to create families that demonstrate his love. I love the warmth that oozes from Paul in his letters. Paul calls both Timothy and Titus “my true child” (1 Tim 1:2, Tit 1:4) as he greets them. Even to churches that frustrate him, he offers warm blessings of “grace and peace” (1 Cor 1:3, 2 Cor 1:2, Gal 1:3).

 

We all want ourselves, our families, and our churches to shine the light of Christ through our good works. But we will short-circuit that effort if we do so with legalistic, anxious, or fearful hearts. Our good works spring from the heart soil of belovedness. May our hearts, our homes, and our churches be places where the atmosphere of grace, joy, hope, and peace pervades. And may Christ be praised as we spread his aroma of belovedness, “For we are the aroma of Christ to God among those who are being saved and among those who are perishing, to one a fragrance from death to death, to the other a fragrance from life to life” (2 Cor. 2:15-16).

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Photo by Gift Habeshaw on Unsplash