An Upside-Down Guide to High School
Today I get to turn the reins over to my son, Soren, who just began his freshman year at the University of Arizona. He looks back and shares advice to those beginning their high school journey. I pray you’re encouraged!
n John Beeson
I vividly remember freshman year, walking into the big leagues with 6-foot-tall basketball players roaming the same halls as myself. Looking to these 18-year-old giants, nay, men who had seemingly figured all things out as they were so very close to tasting the real world. The crowds of friends blocking the hallways, (would I ever be a part of that?), the guy and girl walking side by side, (will I ever have that?), the announcements of the valedictorian over the loudspeaker, and the waves of congratulations that followed their steps, (I wonder if people will ever recognize me?). Within moments of high school, my subconscious was flooded with expectations, ideals, and possibilities for a happy life. Fast forward four years and I now have my diploma in hand and high school in the rear view mirror. Looking back I can confidently say my hopes were not all they were cracked up to be (but there is truth in all of them).
So, here are three major traps for high schoolers, and how God speaks to all of them.
I have to make a name for myself.
Everyone knows Regina George. She’s the meanest, most popular girl in North Shore High. She can get anything out of anyone. Many of us look at Regina from Mean Girls, with disgusted eyes, and if I were to ask you if you would want her life, you would give a clear no. But what about Troy from High School Musical? Everyone knows him, and he’s a great guy. I think every one of us would jump at the opportunity to have a name like that. While you could end up being the guy everyone knows or the girl who is #1 on varsity, and there is nothing wrong with that, I implore you to not seek to be known. What Jesus says in The Sermon on the Mount speaks volumes to this, “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth” (Matt. 5:5).
Set a goal of humility this year. Serve others. To paraphrase C.S Lewis: don’t think of yourself not as less than, but instead think of yourself less. My world revolved around myself for most of high school. My extracurriculars, the weight my name held to others. Don’t get me wrong, don’t turn around and start acting like a jerk because your reputation does not matter. The attitude of the meek isn’t the apathetic shrug, “I couldn’t care less what people think.” Rather, it is the attitude of eagerness for Jesus’ name. Let people remember Jesus’ name when they think of you, not your own. By your service, your overflowing joy in the midst of finals week, your spirit of peace in the ending minutes of your game, or your kindness to the reject who has never had a place to sit. When we can begin to shift focus on that, it changes everything.
2. The more friends, the merrier.
Popularity is tempting and elusive. Think back to your days in middle school, who was the “cool” kid? Can you even remember? If you can, kudos, but you’ll soon forget, and I can likely assure you that the title shifted monthly, if not weekly. Think about trends, back when I was a kid it was dabbing and water bottle flips that were all the rage, now we have people with aura +100 and W Rizz. See how silly these things can be? So I implore you not to look to popularity as you enter high school.
The friend game is about quality, not quantity. Jesus and David show this so well. Jesus, followed by his twelve disciples had his inner circle, John, James, and Peter. David, even while he was being plotted against by King Saul, had Saul's son, Jonathan, to be his peace in the storm. As you seek to find what your inner circle looks like, find the one, the few to be your peace in chaos. Who do you think will speak God’s love to you when you cannot? If you don’t have that friend yet, pray. He is faithful in answering prayers in his timing. Jesus blesses those who choose the few and live righteously, rather than those who live in sin to fit in with the crowds, “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you” (Matt. 5:11-12). Just like the prophets often seemed a little different, the one God has for you might not be at all who you expected. Church is one of the best places to find someone who can be that kind of friend for you. So dig deep in that community. Ask for God’s eyes, look to that reward, and live righteously. Seek your inner circle.
3. My Grades = My Future
“High school is where it all starts to matter.” I am sure that you’ve already heard this or are going to soon. Teachers cracking down on you because your grades are starting to be recorded for colleges and friends telling you that they need you to tell them the answers to the test or else they’re going to fail. And that very failure won’t get them into the college they want, and then won’t get them the job they need, which will leave their lives a mess. That’s lot of pressure, don’t you think? It can be much easier to get swept up in the tides of grades than to differentiate and follow Paul’s instructions, “Whatever you do, work heartily, as for the Lord and not for men, knowing that from the Lord you will receive the inheritance as your reward. You are serving the Lord Christ” (Col. 3:23-24).
When we can be faithful to Christ's calling in our lives and work hard for those purposes, rather than our self-glory, great will be the reward. The world measures success by grades, and eventually a paycheck, Christ measures it in the opposite way as seen in Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven” (Matt. 5:3). Solomon puts it bluntly in Ecclesiastes 5:12, “Sweet is the sleep of a laborer, whether he eats little or much, but the full stomach of the rich will not let him sleep.” This wisdom focuses not necessarily on the size of the paycheck, but rather on the contentment you have in Christ.
So what’s the takeaway? Seek gratitude. Seek joy. Seek to love one another. Pursue Christ. Jesus’ sermon teaches us an upside-down hierarchy of the world we live in. Chase that, and you will be satisfied.
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